Be the Son of God. |
Failing that, claim that you are. |
Teach the true path to redemption and enlightenment. |
Or claim that you do. |
Be popular among the masses. |
If popularity is difficult to achieve, then try among the young, the disillusioned and the ignorant. Drugs can help. |
Wear unusual clothes. All in one colour helps. |
When anyone makes fun of you, or the clothes you have chosen (and they will) forgive them. Very publicly, and at the top of your voice. |
Always speak in metaphors. This will make you seem more intelligent, and mean that nobody can prove you wrong. |
Grow a beard. |
Achieve notoriety among members of the establishment by threatening the status quo. |
Die. For preference, make this a horrible death, tragically young. |
Make regular appearances in chip shops, shopping malls, &c. once you have successfully died. |