This is The News |
 Issue number 12 |
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A correspondent was waiting to cross busy Suffolk St. in Dublin, when an American tourist joined him on the pavement just when the traffic lights changed, emitting their familiar electronic bleep. "What noise is that?" asked the American, evidently perplexed. Being a friendly sort, the correspondent explained that the sound was meant to alert blind people that the lights had changed. "Gee" said the American, clearly amazed, "back in the States, we don’t even allow blind people to drive!"
Councillor A. J. Rabson told Monday's meeting of the rural council: "Today was the first day for nine days that some residents have been able to use their toilets. Something has got to be done very soon to relieve this situation."
A New Zealand motorist was unknowingly snapped by a speed camera. Notification of a $40 fine arrived in the mail together with the speed camera photograph. The New Zealand Police Association Newsletter reports that the inventive motorist sent the police a photograph of two $20 notes. A few days later he received a reply from the police containing a photograph of handcuffs.
Charles is very much a hands on gardener who loves to weed, prune, and dead-head himself.
Following a series of burglaries at a community centre in Croydon, staff put up a notice saying "Nothing left to steal" but theives broke in the next day and left a note saying "Just Checking".
The Headlines again:
Aliens to fill future jobs need say experts
Cloning warning as Japanese grow frog eyes in laboratory
German Army is told to let women fight
Zoo rescues Tom Thumb
Pygmy caught in mouse trap
God is "more important" the second time around
Hitler travelled for years after death
Drug Squad nabs flying carpets
Deaf magician disqualified for hearing
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