The Art of being the Queen

Some simple rules of thumb (and people).
Issue number 26
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Do you want to be the Queen? Have you got what it takes to become the ruler of a nation?
  • Be female. (We're not talking about that type of queen dearie!)
  • Have your Great Grandfather/mother marry the monarch of a country.
  • Have your distant ancestors declare war against a country, and WIN.
  • When out driving, make sure that someone else does the actual driving while you sit in the back and wave nonchalantly at anyone you pass.
  • Print lots of small pieces of paper with your photo and some numbers on and claim to shopkeepers that they are actually worth something.
  • When it comes to your turn to pay for something, never have any money on you.
  • Hire lots of bodyguards and make them wear ludicrous costumes.
  • Invite lots of Japanese tourists to take photos of you and your home.
The origins of a folk belief. Return to the top of the page. Return to the front cover. A regular monthly insight into the lives of our six-legged colleagues.
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