Postbag

Dear OGS,

I wish to complain about an elephant that I saw yesterday. It was all grey and wrinkley and reminded me of my father.

Yours, for the banning of all behemoths,

Kevin Cherubini

SW responds:

I feel it somewhat disappointing that you should find objectionable something that is only doing what nature intends for it. There is nothing wrong with this poor elephant, and it does not deserve you complaint. It is the elephant's job to remind you of your father, and you've only got yourself to blame.

Dear Surrealist Worker readers,

This issue marks the start of the second year of regular publication. This is something that I am constantly amazed by. Ooo. There I go again, being amazed. The idea for this magazine as a paper publication started so long ago, and never actually saw the light of day as a finished article. I'm astounded that I've been able to produce something monthly for a whole year, but I'd like some help.

Recently, a few of you have submitted some news items, but I want more! Ideas for articles, horoscopes, anything really. If you want to write a complete page, then so much the better. I don't promise to include everything I receive, but as long as it's not obviously ripped off, I'm open to most things (except female arse fondlers in that order). Send your stuff to

What can we expect in the coming year?

More of the same probably. I expect to continue the monthly schedule, though it's getting increasingly difficult to get ideas. I'd like to be able to promise well planned out issues, prepared well in advance, but I'm sure I'll always be writing them right up to (and occasionally beyond) the deadlines.

There'll be more of the sort of articles you've come to expect (i.e. the ones I find easiest to write). This December, I hope to have an advent calendar that takes less than a month to work online (last years' worked OK if you downloaded all the pictures first!) and there'll be a new pantomime for New Year. I'll be doing more "Art of..."s, transcriptions of more drunken conversations (look out for yogurt, coming soon!), more use of the forums, and lots, lots more! Well some, anyway.

In the meantime, don't forget to write.

Yours,

Odd Gonk Shine.

SW responds:

I'm not responding to my own letter. Get away with you!